Kiss the Beef - Episode 4 (Off Week)

TALIESIN: Okay, Advik it is. Advik's going to be a little weird. They're a little--
MATT: You can see Milo trying to clean their ear.
TALIESIN: Yeah. Effid, fuck you for Effid, okay.
MARISHA: Just tell us now. Why are you being so weird?
TALIESIN: Well, people have interesting-- I have a lot of relationships in this town, and some are better than others, and some are okay, and sometimes I don't really remember where they stand, and we find out.
MARISHA: Oh.
TALIESIN: So.
MARISHA: That's exciting.
LAURA: So you potentially have beef with Advik?
ROBBIE: Or is it like a kissing relationship?
TALIESIN: They potentially have beef with me.
MARISHA: Did you kiss them?
ROBBIE: Did you kiss the beef?
TALIESIN: God, I hope not.
SAM: Are you too upset to do this? Is this going to cause you pain?
TALIESIN: I was just hoping this was going to be easy, but this is okay, this is okay, so.
SAM: Do you need help? Do you need us to do the talking? Are you all right?
TALIESIN: We'll see how it goes. You know what? I'm excited to bring everybody to Elder's Post. Let's go see somewhere really interesting, see some good shopping, don't get your shit stolen, okay?
LAURA: Right.
TALIESIN: Okay.

Campaign 3 Episode 4, "On the Trail of a Killer," November 10, 2021

Thanks to critrole.fandom.com for the transcript from the episode shown above.

Kiss the Beef

We're fucking Advik? What's happening?

First, a disclaimer. This week is American Thanksgiving, which means no Critical Role tonight, so I'm saving my recipe from last week's episode for this Thursday to keep with the pacing (so be sure to come back for it!). Because it's an off week, I went back to a previous episode for inspiration. I may or may not continue this trend going forward, depending on how busy I am for these off weeks, but this one happened to line up perfectly, so here we are. Apologies for the lateness of the post. Thanksgiving weekend got a LOT busier than I anticipated but better late than never.

When I heard "did you kiss the beef?" the first time, not only did I laugh, but the phrase got stuck in my head. It's too perfect, but I needed a beef worth kissing. Traditionally, in our house, we have a Thanksgiving Turkey, but our Holidays this year are a bit topsy-turvy. This is actually the dish we typically have for Christmas Dinner. We won't be home for Christmas, however, so we bumped it up to Thanksgiving (and, believe me, no one in this house minds). 

Ingredients

• 1 cup Butter
• 7 cloves of garlic, minced
• 2 Tbsp fresh rosemary, finely chopped
• 2 Tbsp fresh thyme, finely chopped
• 2 Tbsp salt
• 1 Tbsp Pepper
• 5-pound boneless ribeye roast*

* Important note about the roast, it doesn't have to be 5 pounds, and it can be more than 5 pounds. You'll want to aim for a minimum of about 3 pounds, any smaller than that and this won't work quite right. The grocery store might also call this Rib Roast or Standing Rib Roast. Also, if the bones are still on the steak, that's okay! Boneless is ideal, but we can work with bones too (it's a bones day!).

Directions

1. Several hours before (I personally do the night before) take the cup of butter out of the fridge, and let it come to room temperature. It's easier to work with this way and we don't want it melted.
2. Preheat the oven to 500 degrees F (260 C). Remove herb leaves from stems and chop the leaves. 
3. Mix the butter, minced garlic, chopped rosemary and thyme, salt, and pepper in a bowl. 
4. Rub the herb butter all over the rib roast (you can skip the bottom) then place it on a rack in a roasting tray
5. Bake for 5 minutes per pound (10 minutes per kilo), with a minimum of 25 minutes. (Examples: if you have your 5-pound roast, it would be 25 minutes, if it's a 3-pound roast, it would also be 25 minutes. If you have a 7-pound roast it would be 35 minutes, and so on)
6. Turn off the heat** and let the rib roast sit in the oven for 2 hours. DO NOT open the oven door as that will let the heat out.
7. After 2 hours, remove roast from oven, let it rest for 5 minutes before cutting into it.

**Important note about the heat in ovens. My oven loses heat VERY rapidly, even leaving the oven door closed, it would cool off faster than needed for this recipe. If you know this about your oven, you might want to adjust your cooking plan. Here are a couple of choices:

• Set your oven to the lowest temperature possible for the 2 hours (for us the lowest option was 150 F).
• Alternate having the heat on in your oven every 30 minutes on a lower setting (Maybe the lowest setting, maybe about 200 F, depending on how quickly your oven gets cold), and then turning it off for 30 minutes. 
• These instructions are all for "traditional" ovens, not convection ovens. I'm not sure of the big difference and how it might affect your roast, but consider doing some research before using a convection oven.

 

Tips, Suggestions, and Substitutions

Tips & Suggestions

• You can remove leaves easily by sliding your finger down the stem/branch in the opposite way the leaves grow, In most cases, they slide right off!
• This roast goes really well with mashed potatoes and a side of roasted broccoli (or green beans or asparagus, or your favorite green veggie).
• You can use the drippings from the roast to create a gravy with 2 tablespoons of flour, and 2 cups of beef stock
• Don't use dried herbs for this, fresh herbs are pretty important to this dish being successful. 
• I mentioned that we can work with bones as well. If your Prime Rib has bones, it's no problem. Go ahead and cook it with the bones on, and when you slice it be aware that you'll need to slice it with the bones in mind. 

Substitutions

• If you are confident with flavor combinations and know your fresh herbs, you could probably swap some out. These have been the best combination that I've tried, but I'm sure they aren't the only options! 

In Conclusion...

I've made this prime rib once a year for about 5 or 6 years now. I definitely know how to make this work, and what it looks like when it's unsuccessful. The scariest part is that the outside is so browned and flavorful that you don't usually know how it'll look inside 'til you cut it! While it looks complicated, I promise, it's pretty hard to screw it up. It's much easier to undercook it than to overcook it (in my opinion). You DEFINITELY want it pink in the middle, so that's the goal! Be aware that these kinds of roasts get pretty pricey pretty quickly, so plan your budget ahead of time. But it's worth it for a rich slice flavorful cut of beef that you could just... well... kiss!

This recipe originates from Tasty.co, their Prime Rib with Garlic Herb Butter. This is a recipe that I have made for years and I don't defer from it much as it consistently works. They include instructions for making gravy from the drippings, which I don't usually do. Now, if you know ways to improve upon this recipe, I'm all ears! Let me know as I'm always interested in adjustments and changes people make. And, if you have any questions or suggestions, or just wanna say hi, please leave them in the comments below. Remember to follow me on Pinterest or Twitter, if those kinds of things are your jam. Thanks for visiting, and don't forget to love each other. Is it Thursday, yet?

"That took you on a ride for just a brief touch of the tongue." It's very delicious.

Kiss the Beef

Yield: 10

Author: Sam of Critical Cooks

Prep time: 15 MinCook time: 25 MinInactive time: 2 HourTotal time: 2 H & 40 M

It'll take you on a ride with just a brief touch of the tongue. This beef is good enough to possibly start a kissing relationship.

Ingredients

• 1 cup Butter
• 7 cloves of garlic, minced
• 2 Tbsp fresh rosemary, finely chopped
• 2 Tbsp fresh thyme, finely chopped
• 2 Tbsp salt
• 1 Tbsp Pepper
• 5-pound ideally boneless ribeye roast (see notes)

Instructions

1. Let the butter come to room temperature (but not melted)
2. Preheat the oven to 500 degrees F (260 C). Remove herb leaves from stems and chop the leaves.
3. Mix the butter, minced garlic, chopped rosemary and thyme, salt, and pepper in a bowl.
4. Rub the herb butter all over the rib roast then place it on a rack in a roasting tray
5. Bake for 5 minutes per pound (10 minutes per kilo), with a minimum of 25 minutes (see notes on cooking time)
6. Turn off the heat and let the rib roast sit in the oven for 2 hours. DO NOT open the oven door as that will let the heat out. (See Notes for details on Oven Heat)
7. After 2 hours, remove roast from oven, let it rest for 5 minutes before cutting into it.

Notes:

Note about the roast: Can be more or less than 5 pounds (but we suggest no less than 3). May be labeled as a Rib Roast or a Standing Rib Roast. Bones are not ideal, but you can use a roast with bones and slice around them.

Notes on cooking time: If you have your 5-pound roast you would cook it for 25 minutes, if it's a 3-pound roast, it would still be 25 minutes. But, if you have a 7-pound roast it would be 35 minutes, for example.

Notes on Oven Heat: The heat needs to stay in your oven but some ovens cool quickly. If you know your oven has this trait consider cooking it on the lowest possible temperature for 2 hours, or for a portion of the 2 hours to ensure the roast is cooked through.

See the original recipe for full details, notes, tips, and suggestions.

Nutrition Facts

Calories

1771

Fat (grams)

122.6

Sat. Fat (grams)

51.7

Carbs (grams)

1.9

Fiber (grams)

.7

Sugar (grams)

0

Protein (grams)

160.5

Sodium (milligrams)

3847

Cholesterol (grams)

.4

These are approximations. based on a 5-pound roast.

https://critical-cooks.blogspot.com/2021/11/kiss-beef-episode-4-off-week.html

prime rib, beef, Dorian, Ashton, Critical Role

dinner